Fixing me up.

Prior to the melt-down at the end of February, I am finally officially going to counselling to fix myself up. Today, there were 2 things happening; one, my 6-months suspension is finally approved. Two, I went for my initial counselling appointment today.

Since that horrible week I had in February, I had been talking and crying a lot, but lately, I was fine. I don't cry any more, I do things that I am supposed to do, although, there are times where I am more forgetful than ever as well as times where my mind just wanders around and confuses me.
But today, I got to dig deeper. I got to talk without worrying what my counsellor will say and how she judges me. I found out, I still cried, I am still hurt, scared and confused. I found I have a lot to solve with myself.

If there is one target that I have, it's a target to fix myself. To get me out of this depression and to get me up and running 'normal' again. I don't want to fix it by medication, I don't want to just sweep it under the carpet, I want to let it all out until I have no more of it in me.

I know, God knows His plans for me. With Him, I can do this.

I am looking forward to next week session.